Laura Cartman
by animekitten03
Summary: Cartman finds out he has a little sister, and on her first day of Kindergarten Ike falls for her. What will Cartman do when he finds out his little sister is crushing on his enimies little brother?
1. Chapter 1

Cartman made his way over to the couch with a bag of Cheesy Poofs and the remote.

He plopped down and turned on the T.V.. Terrence and Phillip were on.

The phone rang.

"MOMMMM!" Cartman called out.

The phone rang again.

"MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOEEEM!"

The phone was still left unanswered.

"God Dammit!"

Cartman reached out to the phone, "Hello"

"Hello, this is George. Is Leann home?"

"NO! If she were do you think I would have answered?"

"Excuse me? Well, uh, if you could just tell her the paperwork for Laura is done."

"Who the hell is Laura?"

"Oh, are you Eric?"

"Yeah! NOW WHO THE HELL IS LAURA?"

"Well, um, I'm not sure your mother would want me to tell you but Laura is your little half sister."

"WHAT?"

"Yeah you see 5 years ago your mother got pregnant with her and the father just died and in his will he asked for Laura to be taken care of your mother. We told your mother all about it and in 3 days or so she will be transported to your home."

"Weak!" Cartman said as he slammed the phone down to hang up.

"MOM! THE FUCK?"


	2. Ike

Cartman looked down at his hands, his palms were sweating and his hands were shaking.

He was waiting for his little sister to arrive.

"Mom?" Cartman asked

"What is it, sweety?"

"What if, what if she's a ginger?"

"It's highly unlikely. You see, neither me or Justin had red hair."

"Phew that's a relief!"

Cartman sank back down in his chair, he was still nervous. Even though he knew his sister wasn't a jew or a ginger, he was still nervous.

"So, when the hell is she going to come?" Cartman asked

"In a few more minutes, Hun," Lianne said trying to comfort her son.

He gently drummed the tips of his fingers against the sofa, thinking of how his sister would view him. Would she look up to him? Or would she, along with many other people, think he is a racist bastard? No, Cartman thought, She would definitely look up to me, I just know it.

The doorbell rang.

"MOM! It's her, It's her!" Cartman shouted.

Lianne made her way over to the door and opened it. There stood a small child dressed in a long pink dress, beside her was a tall man in a suit.

"Thank you, George," Lianne said with a smile, " I'm sure she'll be very happy."

Lianne grabbed Laura's hand and walked her over to Eric.

"Say hello to your little sister, Eric."

"Hey," Eric said.

"Hello..." Laura replied in a small, soft, high pitched voice that Eric couldn't help but smile at.

It was very, VERY rare for Eric to take a liking to someone, especially a girl.

MONDAY

Cartman walked hand in hand with his little blonde sister to the bus stop, Stan, Kyle, Ike, and Kenny were already there.

"Uhh, Cartman who is that?" Kyle asked

"Who her? This is my little sister Laura!" Cartman spat proudly

"That poor girl"

"What did you say Kile!"

"Nothing Fat ass!"

Laura piped up, "Don't call him a fat ass! He's my bwother!"

Ike looked over at Laura, "wow"

Ike smiled and blushed, Kyle noticed his brother's red face

"Ike what's up with your face? If I didn't know any better I'd say you like Laura."

"WHAT! My sister would never like your brother Kile!"

"What would you know Fat ass?"

This time Laura didn't defend her brother because she did like Ike, and was determined to have him as her own.


	3. Kindergarten

**Ok, so it's been a long time since I wrote anything, I'm planning on finishing up my first story, Why Did I Do That, very soon. My Laura Cartman story will be my top priority on fan fiction, but since I want to finish my first story I may have to postpone it for a while. Anyways, here we go.**

Laura walked down the hallway, hand in hand with her older brother. "Eric, will my teacher be nice?"

"I don't know, but if she isn't, tell me. I'll kick her ass." He looked down at his sister and gave her a wink, "Same goes with anybody in your class who thinks they can pick on you and get away with it. I don't care if they're in Kindergarten."

Laura looked down at the floor, "You, um, think maybe Ike will be in my class?"

Cartman stared at her suspiciously, " There's only one Kindergarten class, so yeah."

"Good," Laura mumbled under her breath.

They reached the classroom, "Bye, Eric. Can I have a hug?"

Cartman searched the hallway, when he saw nobody he replied, "Yeah."

He knelt down and gathered her in his arms, " I love you, Laura. Bye."

Suddenly, somebody tapped him on the back, Stan, Kyle, and Kenny stood there. Cartman stood back up, "When the hell did you get here?" He could feel his cheeks burn. Kyle replied, "We were in the restroom."

Ike was at Kyle's side, he gave Laura a shy wave. She waved back.

"Why do you guys always do this! Your always sneaking up on me, Daywalker!"

"Just shut up. It's nothing to be ashamed of, I love my little brother," Kyle replied

"That's cause you're a pussy!"

Kenny piped up, "Hey, fat ass! I love my sis and I'm not a pussy!"

Stan joined, "I hate my sister..."

They started down the hallway to Mr. Garrison's fourth grade classroom.

Laura blushed, "Um, should we go in?"

"Yeah," Ike replied extending a hand. Laura took hold as they entered the classroom together.

~Lunch~

Ike led Laura to the lunchroom, "Umm you can sit with me if you wanna."

Laura smiled, "I want to."

They sat down at the table farthest away from the kitchen, they were the only ones there.

Flora walked up to the table, "Can I sit with you?"

"Sorry, Flora but I have a girlfriend."

Laura looked up from the hamburger she was given in the lunch line, "I'm your girlfriend?"

Ike replied in a tone as if she should have known, "Yeah why else would we hold hands?"

"Cause we're friends?"

Cartman stood, watching as his little sister and Ike held hands and walked down the hallway. He promised his little sister he would walk her home, but she was walking with Ike. Maybe she forced him to walk her. Yeah, that had to be it.

Kenny smiled deviously, "Looks like someone is discovering love a little early."

Cartman turned toward Kenny, "No, my sister is forcing him to be her slave. She can't love him after one day! And plus his brother is Kile! So if they get married Kile will be my brother in law!"

Kenny laughed, "You're going too far ahead in time. I'm sure she'll dump him for some other guy sooner or later."

"I swear you better be right or I'll kick your ass!"

Kenny walked away as he flipped Cartman off, "Bite me!"

Cartman collected his notebooks in his yellow bookbag. Kyle walked up to him, "Hey, have you seen my little brother, I was supposed to walk him home and-"

"It's all your little brothers fault! He's walking my sister home. Kenny thinks they're in l...l... love."

Kyle smiled, "That's great! It's actually kind of cute."

Cartman frowned, "Do you really want to be my brother in law!"

"What!"

Cartman ran away before Kyle could say anything else. He wanted to catch up with Laura. Maybe

if he caught up with her he could stop their evil plan to be together. Yes, that's exactly what he was going to do... And nobody was going to stop him.

Laura squirmed uncomfortably in Ike's hand.

"What's wrong?" Ike asked

"It's just my brother hates your brother he says he's all three J's and that it's really bad if your all three J's"

"I know what you mean..."

Suddenly they heard moving branches.

"Ike what was that?"

Ike turned around and stared quizzically at the nearby bush, Cartman was in it, it appeared he had a notebook and pencil and was scribbling away on the notebook.

Ike walked over to the bush, "Cartman what the hell are you doing?"

Cartman paused as though Ike's eyes could only detect moving objects.

"Cartman I can still see you."

Laura walked up to the bush, "big brother?"

Cartman disguised his voice, "I am not Cartman I am an evil monster who takes notes and eats children. Booooo!"

"Nice try fatass," Ike said

"God Dammit! I'm not fat I'm big-boned!"

**Sorry that was short. I'll try to make next chapter longer.**


	4. Kenny's help

**Okay, I know I said I was going to postpone this story but it seems a lot of people would like me to update soooo, I guess I will. I do not own South Park the awesome Matt Stone and Trey Parker do. **

Cartman sat up in his chair, the notes he had wrote down were very unsettling to him.

-Appear to be holding hands

-Talking casually

-Laughing

-Appear to be having great time

-No whips, dose not appear to be slave

-Laura must actually want to walk with him

-This branch really hurts

He got up and plopped down on his bed.

"Damn," he said to himself, "She really must like him."

He took his pencil and scribbled down a note. He left it on his computer desk then started for the front door.

~Kenny's house~

Cartman walked up to Kenny's house, prepared to talk about the most unsettling thing: His sister going out with Ike. And if anyone knew what happened while dating, it was Kenny.

"KINNY!" Cartman said, "Open the doooooooooor!"

The door crashed open Kenny stood there, "What the hell do you want?"

Cartman sighed, "I know, I didn't want to come here. Your house sucks... But I thought that maybe, in my time of need, you could help."

Kenny's eyes narrowed, "Well if you want my help you should stop making fun of my house. Now, what do you need help with?"

"My sister seems to really like Ike and I need to know, what happens when two people are dating?"

"Well, let's see... They're in Kindergarten...so... nothing."

"No, no, I don't want any of that B.S.! Tell me what do you do to your girlfriend?"

"It's not what I do to them, it's what they do for me," Kenny smiled.

"Should I be worried?"

"In your case no... But if your little sister were older and was dating me, then yes. You should be very worried."

Cartman looked at Kenny in disgust, "How exactly far have you gotten?"

Kenny laughed, "Making out. And the B.J. that killed me"

"What, dude, your fucking crazy!"

"Why because I got a B.J. or because I "think" I died"

"Both."

**Next day**

Cartman looked over at his sister, who was holding Ike's hand.

'_God Dammit!'_ Cartman thought.

Kenny looked over at Cartman, noticing his angst.

He smacked the back of his head, "Calm the fuck down! They're in Kindergarten!"

"But, but he's a jew!"

"I DON'T CARE! STOP FUCKING WORRYING!"

Kenny flashed a smile at Kyle and Stan who were watching Kenny and Cartman fight.

Cartman looked over, "What the hell do you guys want?"

"For you to stop treating my little brother like he has STDs."

"Shut up Kile!"

"I'm not going to fight with you. Let's let your little sister decide if she wants to be with Ike."

Kyle walked away toward Laura, who was on the complete other side of Cartman. He bent down to be level with her, "Hey, sweetie. Do you want to be with Ike?"

Laura looked uncomfortable. "Um..."

**And then you ask yourself, "Is she really going to stop the chapter here?" And then I answer why yes, yes I am. So tell you what, if I get at least 3 reviews on this chapter. I will update quicker... And ya know Laura might say she dose not want to be with Ike. I haven't decided yet. Do you think they should be together? Please post whether they should or shouldn't.**


	5. Standing up

**So yet another chapter... It will be ending soon. Not this chapter but soon. So, here it is.**

It pissed him off. It ate at him, to know that in the future, he could be related to a jew... a Canadian jew... and the worst thing of all. Kyle.

Kyle continued his question, "Do you want to be with Ike?"

Laura fidgeted uncomfortably. "Umm, well... If I answer I may make my brother mad."

Kyle snickered, " Go on."

"I do. I do want to be with Ike, more than anything. But I also want to make my brother happy too."

"Laura, forget your brother for now. What makes you happy?"

"Ike does! I love Ike!"

Cartman let out something that sounded like a wheeze.

Kenny had punched Cartman, "Don't you even care about what she wants, other than what you want! She's your little sister! You should support her choices! I know this is a lot to ask from you but lay off! You say you love her, and trust me we all know you do... But you're not doing a very good job of showing it if you won't even let her love someone." Kenny gave Laura a sympathetic look. Then sighed.

Stan stared blankly, " Uhhhh, yeah, what he said."

Cartman bit his lip until blood came out... He was enraged that someone question his athoritah.

"Y-you guys! She's my little sister! You guys aren't related to her, I am!"

Kenny narrowed his eyes, "What does that have to do with anything?"

"I am her role model! I am! You need to stop interfering. If she marries Ike, then I will be related to him," Cartman pointed at Kyle.

Stan became enraged, "Shut the fuck up! All you care about is yourself! And what's so fucking wrong with being related to Kyle? The one who should be worried is Kyle! If they get married, he'll be related to you! YOU FAT, RACIST, ASSHOLE, SON OF A BITCH!"

Kyle turned toward Stan, "Thanks..."

Stans face turned red, "Y-yeah, whatever"

Cartman laughed, "You're just sticking up for your gay lover!"

Stan's face turned red again, "I-I..." He let out a sigh, "Maybe I am in love with Kyle..."

Kyle blushed redder than Stan.

Kenny spoke, "Uhh...What?"

Cartman just laughed "Told you!"

Laura screamed, "Stop it! You laugh at your friends and you try to cage me! Why would I look up to you?"

"L-Laura?" Cartman yelled, "Go ahead do whatever the fuck you want!"

"Thank you!" Laura ran over to Ike and kissed him, "I love you Ike!"

"I love you too, Laura!"

Kenny grinned, "Told ya to lay off."

"Fuck you, Kinny."

**So they're together and right now you may be asking what happens with Kyle and Stan, well there's going to be a sequel just about them... but seriously I need to finish my first story so I'm sorry you guys are gonna have to wait a little bit. Next chapter is the last, now I don't want to spoil it for you, but here is a clue, future... I'd love to thank my wonderful reviewers and my supporters! 3 **


	6. Shocking News

I'm a Hetalia fan girl! Yey, lol. So I thought I'd finish Laura Cartman. Sorry if it sucks… I'm kind of rushing it. Ummmm. Well this takes place after Laura and Ike are married. Cartman is still pissed and Kyle is still pissed at Cartman for being pissed in the first place… wow lotta umm pissed goin on. Lol. Don't forget to read my other stories… a lot of people seem to like my gum. And Ich liebe dich is also getting a lot of attention seeing as how I just published it yesterday night. Again, thanks to everybody who reviewed and fanned me and my stories. Any questions fanart etc. can be sent to me.

Cartman was sitting in the living room of the new house his little sister and, dare he say it, his brother in law had bought. Kyle was also there with his arms folded and was looking sternly at Cartman, who in turn, was also giving Kyle the evil eye. They were here because Laura had called them there, announcing she had big news. Laura was in the other room with Ike mumbling something that Cartman and Kyle could not quite hear.

"So, Kile, why are you here?"

"Same reason you are fat ass"

Cartman, sunk down in the chair.

Laura walked into the room, holding Ike's arm.

"So, what's all this about?" Kyle asked.  
>"Yeah, I don't understand. What is this about?" Cartman asked.<p>

Laura looked over at him, "Well, this may be kind of shocking to you but…"

Cartman spoke again, "Welll…"

"I'm pregnant."

Kyle beamed, "Congrats!"

Cartman's face turned red, "WHAT!?"


End file.
